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REVIEW: The Meg

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The Meg touted itself as being the blockbuster of the summer, and an epic counter to the classic Jaws movie from the 70s, but despite the special effects, the hype, and the outlandish aspirations, the film is an epic failure from start to finish.

“A deep-sea submersible–part of an international undersea observation program–has been attacked by a massive creature, previously thought to be extinct, and now lies disabled at the bottom of the deepest trench in the Pacific… with its crew trapped inside. With time running out, expert deep sea rescue diver Jonas Taylor (Jason Statham) is recruited by a visionary Chinese oceanographer (Winston Chao), against the wishes of his daughter Suyin (Li Bingbing), to save the crew–and the ocean itself–from this unstoppable threat: a pre-historic 75-foot-long shark known as the Megalodon. What no one could have imagined is that, years before, Taylor had encountered this same terrifying creature. Now, teamed with Suyin, he must confront his fears and risk his own life to save everyone trapped below.”

I’ve covered The Meg quite extensively on Fright Nerd, and I finally got a chance to sit down and tune in to the movie that was made out to be such a big deal.

The highlight of the film was Jack Morris (Rainn Wilson), and not because of any stellar character development, but because it gave me a slight reminder of one of my favorite characters in the history of television, Dwight Schrute from the Office.

The movie is a cluster of nonsense, and Jason Statham delivers another mundane, monotone performance not much different from what you’re used to.

The Megalodon is not frightening, menacing, nor does it strike the fear that Jaws did, at any point. It couldn’t even come close to the ridiculousness that was Deep Blue Sea, which proved to be the far superior film, in the end.

The Meg may be the perfect film to watch as you get ready for bed at night, because nothing in this film is interesting, or exciting enough to keep you from falling asleep.

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25.5 frights
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The Meg may be the perfect film to watch as you get ready for bed at night, because nothing in this film is interesting, or exciting enough to keep you from falling asleep
Fright Nerd Score25.5
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REVIEW: Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark

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Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark

This past weekend, and with much anticipation, Andre Ovredal’s ‘Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark’ hit theaters.

According to the synopsis: “The shadow of the Bellows family has loomed large in the small town of Mill Valley for generations. It’s in a mansion that young Sarah Bellows turns her tortured life and horrible secrets into a series of scary stories. These terrifying tales soon have a way of becoming all too real for a group of unsuspecting teens who stumble upon Sarah’s spooky home.”

Despite the promising premise, I couldn’t find anything to differentiate this film from the run-of-the-mill Goosebumps installment, which left it lacking in many areas, and buried it so deep in stupidity that not even their strong displays of special effects made this a worthwhile time investment.

I couldn’t find a reason to care about any of the main characters such as Stella (Zoe Margaret Colleti) or Ramon (Michael Garza) because this film simply failed to hold my attention.

Rooted in compelling horror stories that may have done well if done completely different, this fill clunked and bored it’s way from start to finish.

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Eli Roth-Produced ‘Haunt’ Arrives in September

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haunt

‘Haunt’, which is a new film produced by Eli Roth and directed by Scott Beck and Bryan Woods, the writing team behind ‘A Quiet Place’, has dropped a new trailer ahead of it’s arrival.

‘Haunt’ is set to make it’s world premier at Popcorn Frights, and will head to theaters on September 13th.

According to the synopsis: “On Halloween, a group of friends encounter an “extreme” haunted house that promises to feed on their darkest fears. The night turns deadly as they come to the horrifying realization that some monsters are real.”

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A Haunted Ship Sets Sail in ‘Mary’

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Mary

RLJE Films has dropped a trailer for ‘Mary’, which they recently acquired and have slated for release in theaters, and on digital and VOD on October 11th.

Starring Gary Oldman and Emily Mortimer, the movie tells the tale of:

“David (Oldman) is a struggling blue-collar captain looking to make a better life for his family. Strangely drawn to an abandoned ship that is up for auction, David impulsively buys the boat, believing it will be his family’s ticket to happiness and prosperity. But soon after they embark on their maiden journey, strange and frightening events begin to terrorize David and his family, causing them to turn on one another and doubt their own sanity. With tensions high, the ship drifts off course, and it becomes horrifyingly clear that they are being lured to an even greater evil out at sea.”

Check out the official trailer below:

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